Week 10 Previews

This week marked the end of an era. The Coastals (Motor City, Happy Valley and most recently Capitol City) are no more. As I look back on Harrison’s 11-year fantasy football career and the contributions he made to this league, I’m reminded of what Champ Kind once said to Ron Burgundy:
“We need you. Hell, I need you. I'm a mess without ya. I miss you so damn much. I miss being with you. I miss being near you! I miss your laugh! I miss - I miss your scent. I miss your musk. When this all gets sorted out, I think you and me should get an apartment together.”
OK, perhaps that went a little too far. But Harrison’s constant spelling errors, number of TE’s on his squad, and overall fearlessness to humble (i.e. ridicule) other fantasy owners was unparalleled. And for that, I salute you.

But the show must go on, so let’s stoke it up.

Matchup of the Week
Hoof Hearted (5-6) vs Burrested Development (5-6)
Fresh off his autocratic and tyrannical rampage as commish, Vic finds himself competing with the team that he’s most likely going to have to slug it out with in order to have a shot at the 4th slot in the playoffs. But Diddy, aka Patric, has lost 5 of his last 6 after starting out hotter than Megan Fox. OK, I’m putting on the swami cap and all I’m getting images of are Megan Fox. What was I talking about again?
Yahoo: Burrested 87-83
NoS: Burrested 104-89

Ballsax (5-6) vs Minnesota Vicodins (8-3)
For those of you who haven’t met Picconi, the Ballsax owner, I present Exhibit A – Ruxin from the FX show “The League”. Educated yet crass. Arrogant yet paranoid. He even looks like the guy for Christ Sake. If you haven’t checked out this show by now, you should be shot.
Yahoo: Ballsax 89-88
NoS: Vicodins 90-81

Nads of Steel (5-6) vs Korn on the Kolb (6-5)
I’m going on a limb here, but there’s no way a rookie in the league can beat a crafty veteran twice in one season, especially when that veteran now has Tom Brady. As a wise man once told me, “'Fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again'”.
Yahoo: KK 91-85
NoS: Nads 83-78

Tackle Me Elmo (8-3) vs Aggies (5-6)
Vacation in India? I like it. Next time I’m in line for top score and don’t feel like writing, you know where I’ll be (wink wink). I find it odd that not only is Pittsburgh starting Big Ben (concussed and at Baltimore), but the Aggies are too with 2 healthy QB’s on the shelf. Aggies, I admire your cajones.
Yahoo: TME 100-85
NoS: Nads 83-78

Steel Curtain (3-8) vs Newport Beach Apples (9-2)
Chris, I just want to say that I’m proud of you son. After years of public humiliation, you’ve finally made it to the top. Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes said/sang it best: “Lord lift us up where we belong, where the eagles fly on a mountain high”. Am I the only one thinking about a dreamy Richard Gere in his Navy whites right about now? Damn it.
Yahoo: NBA 90-64
NoS: NBA 95-76

Capital City Coastals (3-8) vs Breach Kid (4-7)

If BK can’t get a win this week vs the ghost writer (Zictor Vhao), then he should call it quits just like “he who shall not be named”. I guess I should be rooting for my own flesh and blood, but how can I not pull for the CCC’s? I’m always a sucker for a good underdog.

Yahoo: BK 97-65

NoS: CCC 62-61

RIP Coastals 1999-2009